You can't play on broken strings
by Bubblebaer
Summary: "Damn right! It's Sam Evans, you remember? I was your boyfriend in highschool." He didn't even know what he was talking. His words came out of his mouth too fast, he couldn't stop them. "How did you get this number?" She asked with a cold voice. It only made him angrier. "From you, when you were kissing me after prom. You obviously never changed it." Sam said mad.
1. How can I give anymore

_**This is my first fanfiction in English. It's not my first language.  
I hope you still enjoy it. And thank you to two good friends of mine, ronni and kathi. **_

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee, but I wish I did. **

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**CHAPTER 1  
**_**How can I give anymore**_

It has been a while since Highschool. He had dreams before graduation, but they didn´t work out. It was such a stupid dream to become a famous Illustrator. Sam couldn´t even draw. But he thought, he only had to find someone who would draw his ideas. It wasn't easy, actually it was impossible to find someone, who was not creative enough to get his own ideas on paper. It was frustrating for him. He didn´t have a clue what he was doing with his life. It seemed pointless to do anything. So he gave up working all together. Sitting on the couch and watching cartoons. That had been his life for so long. He didn´t have hope for a future outside of his home now that he had lived with his parents in this little tiny house in Kentucky for at least ten years now. He already knew he couldn't live there forever, but it was so easy. His mother was cooking for all of them and every evening they were sitting at the dining table, talking about their day. Of course every second day they fought because Sam was still at home with no work and all his laziness. His parents weren't proud of him, but he didn't care. Once his mother told him, she didn't recognize her son anymore, the good one who was working to get his brother Stevie new shoes or the little princess Stacie a doll. She cried and Sam felt guilty but he thought he was a loser. She had to accept that.

College wasn't an option either because of his learning disability. Sam had not applied in the first place, because of it. He told his parents, he was rejected by every College he had applied. His father was really mad when he found out, but Sam didn't care. At some point of his life, he had lost his way.

"Sam c'mon we gotta go." His sister Stacie yelled through the house. It had been his home for so long, and now it was empty and cold.

"I'm already on my way." Sam sighed.

It has been three months, since his parents died in a car accident and it still felt like yesterday to him. In the night of the accident, he hadn't been at home. For the first time in a couple of months he had been out, meeting an old friend from McKinley Highschool. Artie Abrams, the boy in the wheelchair and the very smooth sound in his voice. It had been years, since he thought off his old Highschool in Lima, Ohio. He lived there for one year, it had been a rough year. After his family moved from Tennessee to Ohio he wanted to be popular at Highschool, but he joined the Glee Club instead. The best thing he had ever done in his life. He had been a Member of a second family and he had loved them. But his Dad had lost his job and they had to move from Lima to Park Hills in Kentucky. Back then he thought he could never forget them, but he almost did.

Sam met Artie at the pharmacy one week before the accident happened. His little sister was ill and needed some medicine. Sam was really surprised to see him there after all those years. Artie talked about his marriage with Sugar Motta and the divorce three years later and that he had no contact to the other members of the Glee Club. But they couldn't talk long, because Sam's sister called and said she was dying and needed her medicine. So they agreed to meet a few days later, to talk.

_Sam was very excited to meet Artie again. He wanted know every single detail that happened after he moved to Park Hills. It had been a really long time, since he thought about Rachel, Quinn, Finn and the other members of Glee Club. _

_He had to work as a stripper to get money to support his parents, so the start in Kentucky was stressful. Sam was always scared his father would lose his job again and they would have to move out of their new home. The first year was rough at Kentucky and so he lost the contact to his friends. He was very frustrated back then. But at senior year their financial situation was saved and finally Sam could quit his job. But he wasn't the same child, because he had to grow up to an adult too fast. Besides he wanted to contact Finn, but he was too ashamed of not calling or texting, so it was frustrating too. After all he never called anyone of the Glee Club and said to himself, it was pointless to do anything. So maybe he lost his way at this point of his life. But that didn't matter, he wanted hear all dirty secrets that happened._

_He already saw Artie at a table in the Bar, when he arrived. Sam gave him a short hug and sat down on the chair next to him. _

"_Good to see you again." Sam said with a smile. _

"_Good to see you, too." Artie smiled too and after the greeting they both ordered a beer. _

"_So what are you doing in Kentucky?" Sam asked interested._

"_At the moment? I'm waiting to get my beer." Artie laughed. Sam laughed too and shook his head._

"_No seriously, man, what are you doing here, in Park Hills, little village, where nothing exciting ever happens?" Sam said and thanked the waitress for his beer._

"_I'm on a Road Trip." Artie said and took a swallow from his beer. _

"_By yourself?" Sam frowning. _

"_No idiot. I'm with a group of people. We are on the way to New York." Artie laughed loud. _

"_Of course, that makes sense." Sam said with an apologetically smirk. _

"_So, what are you doing, if you not on a Road Trip?" Artie smiled._

"_It's a Theatergroup Sam, we are on tour. I wrote the play. It's about friendship and all that stuff." Sam's eyes were big. Artie also produced a play, written by himself. They are together on tour. That sounded great and made him feel like a loser. _

"_And what are you doing?" Artie asked._

"_This and that." Sam rubbed his neck. "You know, stuff.", he said. It was really embarrassing, but Artie didn't asked further and so he took a swallow of his beer. There was a awkward silence between them, that made Sam feel uncomfortable. _

"_So you said, you were married to that Sugar Motta Girl." Sam tried to ignore the awkwardness of the situation. _

"_Yeah, Sugar. I met her in senior year at McKinley Highschool, she was a terrible singer, but kind of sweet." Sam smiled and for once since years he allowed himself to think of Mercedes. How was she doing? _

"_Also crazy, but I fell in love with her on Valentine's Day, when she performed Love Shack. She was with someone else, but that didn't stop me." Artie said with a big grin on his face. _

"_Lady's man." Sam said und laughed. _

"_Of course, have you ever known me different?" Artie looked to Sam with a big grin. "No really, I was just such a lucky guy that she fell in love with me. But it didn't work out, so i am now single, again." Artie shrugged his shoulders. Sam thought he saw a sad look in Arties face for one moment, but he decided to ignore it. _

"_Um so are you in touch with the others?" Sam knew Artie said already, that he hadn't contact with them. _

"_No, I am not. But I know that Rachel is on Broadway."_

"_How do you know?" Sam asked surprised. _

"_I read the newspaper." Artie shrugged his shoulders. That made sense. _

"_Oh, I am not." Sam laughed ashamed. _

„_She made it Sam. Rachel is in debate for a huge Hollywood movie. I think she is becoming a big actress."_

"_Well, it's seems she has everything she ever wanted." Sam looked to his empty beer. His hand played with the glass. _

"_She doesn't have Finn." Artie said serious._

"_Why is that?" Sam asked immediately. _

"_Finn broke up with her and joined the Army." Artie required the waitress. _

"_What?" Sam spit the words out. They broke up? They had kissed at the Regionals Show Choir Competition and killed their chance to make the title. Sam remembered the moment on stage, while they had kissed, he was so shocked at the moment, that he took Mercedes hand and looked at her. She had smiled and shook her head. She had definitely thought the same as he, it was impossible they came together in such a moment. But love was love. Sam smiled. _

"_Oh boy, that's a really long story. The short version is, they were engaged and after graduation they wanted to get married. But only Rachel made it to the New York University, actually to the NYADA, her dream university. Finn thought he stopped her from her dreams, so he broke up with her, because he loved her." Artie took a deep breath. "I don't think they got back together."_

_Sam looked interested at Artie und was shocked by the news. He always had hated it that he had to move away from Lima, but now these feelings were stronger in his chest than ever before. Sam was glad, after the waitress got their two new glasses of beer. He took a deep swallow and shook his head. Impossible what happened. He thought again what happened with Mercedes, but he was scared to ask. Maybe she had a boyfriend, after their relationship in the summer. Sam was devastated. Maybe she was engaged in senior year too. He realized that his heart raced. _

"_Tina and Mike?" He asked. The always were the dream couple on McKinley Highschool. _

"_Tina broke up with Mike, because the distance was killing her." Artie said sad. _

"_No way!" Sam said loud and a few pairs of eyes fixed him. He ignored them. _

"_It was a hard time." Artie said dramatically. _

_Sam didn't know what to say to that. Artie seemed to see it as an invite to go on and he did. He told him about Rory an irish guy and the living Jesus Joe. He told Sam about Quinns accident in senior year and how rough it was for her. He told him about their fight with the Warblers. Sam listened and it pulled him down. He had never been so frustrated in the last years. It was impossible what he missed in just one year of Highschool. He took a deep swallow from his glass and looked at Artie, who told him the whole story about the Glee Members. He also told him that Puck had been in Lima and Artie really did not know what had happened to him. But Sam bothered that he said no word about Mercedes._

"_What about her?" He nearly screamed and stared Artie. Artie frowned. Sam didn't mention her name, but it was obvious which part of the Glee Club he meant. _

"_Are you living on this planet?" Sam wasn't in the mood for a joke. He was pissed that Artie hadn't said a word about Mercedes. Sam's heart screamed for information about her. _

"_You really don't know?" Artie was surprised. "She is a famous singer. Fuck, you really don't know?" Artie looked amazed. Sam on the other side was numbed. He didn't even blink. His Mercedes did it and he had no inkling. That was fantastic. He smiled and after a few minutes he looked at Artie. _

"_Sam, are you okay?" Artie asked. _

"_She did it, damn good girl." Sam said with a big grin. He was damn proud of his girl, although she had not been his girl for a long time, but at this moment it still felt like they were still together. _

"_Artie I never heard about her. Is she that famous?" Artie pushed his left eyebrow up. _

"_Sam she has won a Grammy a few years ago. Is Park Hills such a village?" He asked. Sam sighed. No it was not, but he had been outshouted from the world. He didn't even remember when he watched the news or commercial tv the last time. He had watched cartoons or had written songs. He never realized _how insulated he had lived, until now.

"_Yeah-" He was interrupted by his cellphone. The ringtone was 'red solo cup' by Toby Keith. "Excuse me." He said to Artie and walked out of the bar. _

"_Stacie? What is going on?" Sam heard the broken voice of his sister and at that moment he panicked. "Talk to me, is something happened?" He heard her crying and he stopped to breath. He listened to her, but she didn't say anything. Sam got anxious. _

„_Talk to me Baby." He craved. Finally she said a word. He couldn't understand, because she cried so badly. But she spoke, it was a progress. _

"_Calm down Baby, what happened?" He tried to understand what happened to her, but she had been really out of it. _

"_Are you alright, are you hurt?" Sam streaked with his hand through his hair. _

"_No. I'm fine, but mom and dad-" She cried again and Sam felt sick. What happened to his parents? Finally his sister said the words he almost expected. They were dead._

"Sam?" Stacie came into the room and looked at her brother. She felt heartbroken, when she saw his pain and she pushed him into a hug. Sam did not move at all. It was so damn painful and he felt lost. He never expected to lose his parents so soon. He maybe was twenty-six but he needed them more than ever, why were they gone? He couldn't understand why this had happened. Sam felt like a child, bereft of his parents.

Sam's face was full of pain. He already missed his parents. He had no clue how to live without the kindness of his Mom or the helpful hand of his Dad. He almost regretted that he had so many fights with them. He had not been a good son to them since Highschool.

"It's going to be fine." His sister whispered, while she hugged him. Finally Sam embraced his sister too and accepted that she tried to comfort him. He never was the part of the family who needed a hug or a smile to get over his problems. But now, he needed his sister and brother, to survive the pain in his chest. Sam's glimpse fell to the window behind them. It was small, nothing big or obvious, but he felt sick again. He freed himself from the hug and walked by Stacie. It was just a little tiny detail from his mother. The Dreamcatcher he made in preschool. It hung in the window to catch bad dreams and to give the good dreams a chance. Sam touched it and couldn't believe that she kept it all those years. Tears sprung to his eyes.

"Are we ready to go?" Stevie finally joined his siblings in the master bedroom.

"I don't think so.", said Stacie to his brother and portended to Sam, who stood at the window and cried.

"Sam, it's going to be fine." Stevie said. Sam whisked the tears from his cheek and turned around to his siblings. He had to be strong for them. Stevie was already an adult but Stacie was only seventeen. He was her guardian now their parents were gone. He was the one who should them tell, that everything was going to be fine. But he couldn't be this strong person at the moment. He just shook his head and walked past the two to leave the master bedroom and the house, he couldn't take it any longer.


	2. And everything could change

_**Thannnnnk you very much for the follower and alerts about your fav's.**_

_**Because of you started my week with a huge smile. I think Sam needs just a situation or person to get out of his cave. He couldn't handle the situation to move from Lima so I think it killed his lovely hopeful soul… But there's always a way to get it back =) **_

_**Thank you for reading =)**_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee, but if I did samcedes had got a huge big kiss at the end of season 3. **

**CHAPTER 2 **

_**And everything could change like that**_

"I said get up!" Mercedes ordered Quinn who was lying on her couch, snoring. Mercedes had tried to wake her up for one hour, but Quinn seemed to be in a coma. She was really late and didn't have time for this. She didn't want Quinn to be alone in the huge house of hers, because she seemed sad and had been totally drunk when she stood outside her door at the night.

"Damn.", Mercedes grumbled while she went to the guests bathroom. She took a face towel and soaked it. Then she went back to Quinn. She felt already bad for her couch, but brought that sacrifice. Mercedes couldn't suppress a little smirk on her face when she squeezed the towel over Quinn's face. The water splashed on the face of her Highschool friend and Mercedes bit on her tongue to stop herself from laughing. Quinn shrieked loudly and finally woke up.

"Good morning Sunshine, did you sleep well?" Mercedes grinned.

"Fuck, Mercedes." She yelled. Two seconds later she held her head and her face blurred in pain. "It hurts." she said.

"Hardly surprising." Mercedes was amused by Quinn, but she also wanted to know why she did show up or why she had been drunk in the first place. She looked at her watch and sighed. She was already too late to get to the meeting in time.

"Do you want some coffee?" Mercedes asked, while she put out her cellphone and called the number of her agent.

She told him to delay the meeting for a few days, because she had to handle some private stuff. The private stuff was a pretty little blonde girl on her couch with a huge hangover. Of course she didn't tell her manager this detail, it wasn't his business. He was mad and yelled at her, that she would never get the big deal, if she wouldn't change her attitude. She didn't care, because she loved her attitude, plus she already had a good deal, that was enough for her. She had won a Grammy and had got a number one album. It's was more then she had ever dreamed of. Mercedes didn't need an international career. She wanted it, but she didn't need it.

After she hung up, Quinn joined her to the kitchen.

"Yes please. I need coffee." She sounded like a zombie.

Quinn blinked again. "When did I get here?"

"Last night, you were funny." Mercedes said with a smile on her face.

"Funny like... crazy funny?" Mercedes nodded and Quinn sighed.

The last time they saw each other Quinn had been in a relationship with this tall sunburnt blonde guy. His name had been Lucas and he had been a beach boy. Quinn had been totally in love with him. There had been out together in that new club which had opened at the same night. Mercedes had not dated anyone back then, so she had been alone and that had been fine. Quinn had seemed really happy with her guy and they had a lot of fun. But Mercedes had felt that something would happen. After all she knew Quinn since Highschool and her life was never drama free. It was almost midnight, when Quinn had danced alone on the floor, while Mercedes had apologized to the ladies restroom. She would never forget how she saw the sunburnt asshole fucking another woman. She starred at them, but it hadn't bothered them.

But behind Mercedes Quinn came along, talking about how she really had to pee. In the next minute hell broke loose and Mercedes had to hold Quinn cause she was really mad and pissed and wanted to beat the hell out of the woman and of course of her boyfriend. She had cried, yelled and Mercedes saw that crazy girl from Highschool. She had to take all of her power to get the blonde out of the restroom. She had been really heartbroken and Mercedes had comfort her at home.

But the last night Quinn had not been heartbroken, she had been desperate maybe a little pissed and Mercedes had no clue why.

"So... how did I get here?" Quinn asked, while she took the cup of coffee from Mercedes.

"Don't ask me. You stood in front of my door. How you got here? I have no idea." Mercedes said while she shrugged her shoulders.

"I don't even remember how I got drunk." Quinn said, while she looked to her cup of coffee.

"But you remember that you were drunk?" Mercedes laughed.

"Even when I'm not remembering, my head does." Quinn said with a small smile on her face.

"What happened to you Quinn?" Mercedes asked serious. She knew Quinn and they had both lived in Los Angeles for years. That's why they were still best friends after all these years. They actually met for lunch every Saturday, and they talked a lot on the phone. But in through the last weeks Mercedes had had a lot to do with her career as a singer and had cancelled a few lunch dates. She didn't hear anything bad from her friend and asked herself what was wrong in Quinn's life, again?

"Nothing." Quinn tried.

"Oh hell to the no, save that crap for someone else." Mercedes shouted. Quinn jerked.

"Ouch! My head Mercedes." She complained. Mercedes ignored it.

"Stop it. Are you seventeen again? Tell me what's wrong or I'm calling Kurt." Mercedes meant it.

Kurt was her weapon against Quinn all these years. Everytime she was stubborn about her life or talk about her problems, she used him. She had never had the need to call him. Because he wasn't that restrain and he could be really annoying. Quinn knew that, that's why she always talked before Mercedes could call Kurt.

"Again?" Quinn said smitten. "You bring up Kurt, again? Really?" Mercedes stared her and nodded.

"Okay, fine." Quinn grumbled. She took her cup of coffee and sat down on the couch. She approached her legs and crossed them. Mercedes watched her and it was hard to see her down, sad and frustrated again. She hated that Quinn's life was such a mess and she wished she could do anything against it. Mercedes just didn't know how.

"I got a phone call two weeks ago." Quinn sighed. "It was a little girl on the phone and she said that she was looking for her mother." Mercedes frowned, while she sat next to Quinn at the armchair. "I told her that I have no clue how I could help her." Mercedes got an assumption, but she said nothing. "She said she's looking for Quinn Fabray and I said I'm on the phone." Quinn's face was frozen. "She also said her name is Beth Corcoran." Mercedes saw tears in her best friend eyes and sat next to her to give her a hug.

"She said Shelby died a few months ago, she had cancer. Beth lives with her aunt and she told me she doesn't want to live there any longer." Quinn cried at Mercedes chest.

"What did you say?" Mercedes asked quietly. Quinn sobbed.

"I said that I can't help her. Mercedes, I'm not her mother anymore, not after all these years. I mean my life is a mess." Mercedes grabbed some tissue from her table and gave it to Quinn. "I have nothing to boast, there's no way she can live with me."

"That's not true Quinn." Mercedes rubbed her back.

"Yes it is." Quinn said harsh.

"No, you have your own firm. Is that nothing?" Mercedes didn't actually ask it was more a statement. But she knew that Quinn didn't really mean the business life of her own. It was more the family, she had no men.

After graduation Quinn had joined the Yale Drama Program and became a good actress, confident and really on point at every single performance. But she had not been smart enough to not let her personal stuff crush her career. It was typical Quinn, she fell in love with some guy and really messed it up. She was desperate when Mercedes had an idea.

After graduation Mercedes had had the dream to sing but it had not been easy to find a record label to produce her. Her parents had wanted her to go to college but Mercedes had been stubborn, only wanted to be a musician. So she had searched bars and clubs, where she had performed. It hadn't been easy and she had had a lot of times, when she had wanted to quit. But she had braved and finally a record label had taken her under contract.

At the same time Quinn had gotten her degree from Yale. She had learned to design costumes, direct, stage management and theatre management plus production. Mercedes thought Quinn would be a good manager, because she was smart and Mercedes didn't wanted to be an actress, but music wasn't that different, so she let her be represented by Quinn. It worked out and a few years later Quinn had an own agency 'fabulous fabray' to represent singers, bands and even actors and actresses. It was a really famous business and Quinn now owned a lot of money.

Mercedes didn't really understand why Quinn thought she couldn't handle her own child.

Of course Mercedes knew that Quinn always had the issue to crash her own life, but at least Quinn grew up after all these years. Yeah, her life was a mess, Mercedes thought so too, but it was her lovelife that made her sad or mad everytime. She always choose the wrong men and it always ended in a huge drama. Quinn got mostly drunk and crazy. But this wasn't about one men or her lovelife, it was about her own child, the kid she wanted back in senior year so badly. There was no way Mercedes would let her mess it up in the first place.

"And now?" Mercedes asked carefully.

"Nothing." Quinn sobbed and whisked the tears from her cheeks. "She lives with her aunt, end of story." Mercedes wanted to say something but she didn't. Quinn already felt bad and Mercedes didn't want make it worse. They just sat for a few minutes silent on the couch, as Quinn talked again.

"Do you think she called Puck?" Quinn looked Mercedes in the eyes, hopefully she wouldn't nod. But Mercedes nodded. She definitely thought that she called Puck, after the phone call with Quinn, maybe already previously. She seemed smart to Mercedes, like Quinn. There was no way, that she gave up when Quinn rejected her. Mercedes smiled after her nod.

"I don't think that she found him." Quinn smiled back and it seemed to comfort her. It was a lie, but Mercedes didn't want to make her sad again.

After all Mercedes took a deep breath and stood up. "C'mon let's do a shopping tour." Mercedes said with a big smile. She knew Quinn loved to shop and it always made her happy. Quinn nodded and gave Mercedes a hug.

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"Are you sure?" Mercedes smiled in her Webcam.

"Yeah I am honey. She totally freaked out. She said she can't take care of a child." Kurt looked serious.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Mercedes looked reproachful.

"I'm sorry Mercy, but did I mention that Rachel totally freaked out? She didn't want her and now she as her bigger sister has the duty to take care of her. We are speaking of Rachel insane Berry." Kurt took a deep breath. "She didn't want that girl and now she has it. Can you imagine?" Mercedes shook her head.

"She called Quinn, Kurt, she got totally drunk after that." Kurt laughed, but stopped at Mercedes serious sight.

That wasn't funny. Quinn had totally not been herself for the last few weeks. Everytime she had seen a little girl with blonde hair, she had cried immediately. Mercedes had tried to calm her down, but it hadn't worked. The worst was Quinns silence about the situation. She hadn't wanted to talk about and Mercedes had no idea how she could help her. This whole situation was crazy and stupid. There was Beth, the little girl of Quinn and Puck, adopted by Shelby Corcoran and the stepsister of Rachel. Mercedes remembered the Regionals and the birth of the little girl. Puck had been really proud and Quinn had been happy. But she had been sixteen, not ready for something like that and Mercedes understood this. But now her little girl needed her and Mercedes never thought Quinn would give her up again. She always thought she would try to get in contact sometimes, when she was ready.

It was a long time ago since Highschool, but in this moment she felt like she was back in that time. And with those feelings came thoughts of Sam. Mercedes hated that she had feelings for him after all these years. But their, whatever it had been, had suddenly stopped and Sam had left her behind confused. Mercedes tried to concentrate on Kurt.

"She thinks, she can't be a good mother to Beth." Mercedes said to Kurt.

Kurt lived in New York and one year after he had been rejected by NYADA, he had gotten in and had followed Rachel's footsteps. But after all he had not been that ambitious. Mercedes had always joked that he lost his bit in that one year he searched for another opportunity. Besides he had found his new dream and it wasn't performing. Kurt had always been a fashion diva but when he had started to create dresses and outfits, his love for singing had stepped behind. He had found his true passion and he had cancelled NYADA and had joined the Pratt Institute for Fashion and Design. In the meanwhile he had become a very good Designer. He created a dress for the Grammy's a few years ago especially for Mercedes. It had full-length and was red, it was strapless and flawed perfectly around her body.

"But she can." Kurt answered convinced.

"I know Kurt, but she doesn't listen. You know her." Mercedes sighed. It was impossible to get Quinn to meet her daughter, not without a trick.

"Stubborn, I know. You still have to threat her, have you?" Mercedes nodded and Kurt laughed.

"What's so funny?" Mercedes didn't see him, but she recognized his voice. She waved at Blaine, which must be seeing her.

"Mercedes is always threatening Quinn to talk. She will never forget the talk about her thoughts to cancel Yale." Kurt explained.

"Oh hi Mercedes." Blaine said pleased. Mercedes still didn't see him.

"Sweetie there is no way, you get this chocolate chips today." Kurt said and Mercedes saw how he stood up and let the Laptop stand. She just saw an elbow and then there were two and after a few minutes and a discussion over chocolate chips and work out, they were back together and Mercedes laughed. They jostled for the webcam. She shook her head and laughed louder.

"Are you two insane?" Mercedes smiled and Blaine grinned.

"Just in love." Kurt got a lovely-dovey look on his face, when Blaine said these words. Mercedes loved both of them. There were the only couple who had survived her long-distance relationship and she was glad.

"That's really sweet, but we have a huge problem and no chance to solve it." Mercedes said seriously again. "Rachel doesn't know that Beth searched her parents, does she?" Mercedes asked hopefull that Rachel just concentrated on her career, like she always did.

Kurt shook his head and Blaine gave him a little kiss on his cheek, before he said goodbye to Mercedes. She saw how he grabbed the chocolate chips, but she said nothing.

"I SAW IT!" Kurt yelled at Blaine, who laughed loudly. Mercedes suppressed a loud laugh, but she couldn't suppress a big grin on her face.

"Don't laugh Mercy or I crawl through this Laptop and then…" He stopped and protruded his tongue against Mercedes. She shook her head.

"Pleas don't do that, it's like the girl from 'The Ring'. It scared me to hell." She laughed.

"Let's get serious Kurt. It's good that Rachel knows nothing about the research of Beth, but we don't know if she found Puck?" Kurt shook his head again. Mercedes pondered.

„Where the hell is Puck?" She spoke her thoughts out loud.

"I have no idea. He's no longer in Lima." Kurt said sad. "My Dad said he talked about leaving and never coming back. He said it's time to make a difference. I don't know what this means. My dad doesn't know either." Kurt told.

"And what's Rachel plan about this situation?" Mercedes thought she wanted to get her off of her way, but Beth was her sister after all. She must look for Puck, Mercedes thought. Maybe she could find him and Beth could be with his father. Quinn was not ready or she thought she wasn't. Puck would take care of his daughter. Mercedes was sure about this.

"Nothing." Mercedes sighed.

"Are you serious?" Kurt nodded again and shook his head.

"I don't even know. She got her a nanny and lives her life like before." Mercedes couldn't believe what she heard. There was no way, that Rachel ignored a little girl who lost her mother. That was cruel. She got angry.

"She can't do that." Mercedes said angrily.

"She can, believe me, she can." Kurt scratched his forehead.

"You know what Mercy?" Kurt said with a devilish smile. "I have an idea to get Quinn to take care of her daughter and Rachel to face the truth, that she has a sister who needs her. But I need your help? And if we can't find Puck, then we need Finn at least."

"I'm in." Mercedes said with a big grin. Whatever Kurt planned it always worked out. He was the living scheduler. She was confident that things would work out.


	3. You can't play the victim this time

_**Hey Guys, **_

_**I'm so sorry for this late update. I needed some time to get the Chapter on paper and my B-Reader had problems with her computer. I hope you like this chapter. It's a little bit sad with a little hope in it. I thank you for read and I'm happy for every follower and reader. Thanks guys. **_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. **

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**CHAPTER 3**

_**You can't play the victim this time**_

_There laid a good smell about honey and puff of roses in the air. Sam blinked and saw her beside him. He grinned. She was the cutest girl he ever met and he exactly knew when he fell in love with her. _

_It had been this stupid idea to perform original songs. Sam thought Rachel had been crazy. She had always wanted her spotlight that was for sure, but she had risked the dream of the win for all the other members including him. He he didn't have the motivation to write a song, especially after Santana's 'Trouty Mouth'. It had been embarrassing and he had confessed to himself he had never really been interested in Santana, but he didn't even like her after this song. But then had Mercedes came out with her 'Hell to the no' and he had felt inspired by her. At the start he thought he was just fascinated by her attitude and talent, but after all he knew that it was more than that. Sam thought he was in love with Quinn back then, so he wasn't sure about his feelings for Mercedes. It was strange after all the time, that he thought everyday of her. He looked out for Mercedes in the mornings, just to see her once in the day. _

_Everytime she smiled he had this tingling in his body, it drove him crazy. But he didn't know what to do. He couldn't go to her and say 'hey you make my body crazy'. Of course he could have do this, but he was too shy. So Sam didn't do anything and thanks to Rachel he got his chance to come closer to Mercedes. Okay, he didn't have any idea that Rachel really had asked him to be her prom date again and he would definitely have said no, if it had been just her. But he wanted to go with Mercedes and he thought about asking her out, but he was too shy for that as well. So it was perfect at the end and he agreed to go with them to prom. Luckily Jesse joined them, so he had time with Mercedes and it actually turned into a real prom date. But Sam wasn't stupid. He knew that Mercedes wasn't that kind of girl who looked out for a guy to come along to be her prince. They were friends and as friends at the prom. But he had imagined being her real prom date. _

_Because of the fact, that the New Directions had to perform at prom he didn't have much time with Mercedes. It had bothered him so much, that he always looked out for her, but he couldn't see her on the dance floor. She hadn't danced and he had asked himself more than once, where she had been. Finally he had found her after a few times he had looked out for her. She sat at a table and played with her flower. She looked sad. It made him uncomfortable to see her like this. Sam convinced himself to be brave, just for one time or one night. So he joined her with a big grin and said to himself to be honest. Worst case scenario, she wouldn't speak with him for the next few weeks. He thought he could survive it. So he took a deep breath and talked to her. _

"_Mercedes." She looked up to him and he stared into her beautiful chocolate brown eyes. _

"_Yes." She answered. His heart raced immediately at she looked him asking with her eyes. _

"_I just wanted to tell you that you look beautiful." Sam grinned at her. Her eyes widened and she looked a little bit confused. Sam tried not to be irritated by her eyes. He ignored his racing heartbeat._

"_Would you like to dance?" He asked hopefully and with sweaty hands. His mouth got dry. He held out his hand and waited nervously for an answer. She looked at his hand and he almost thought she would reject him. But then she smiled and he smiled at her too. _

"_I'd love to." Mercedes said and took his hand. Sam felt the tingling immediately at that second she touched his hand. He couldn't believe she said yes. _

_Sam kissed Mercedes' forehead and couldn't believe she was his, since a few weeks. He liked to remember prom. He grinned at her and watched wake her up._

"_Good morning Mercy." He whispered. She already had her eyes closed but she had a big smile on her face. _

"_Hey Sam." She whispered back. Mercedes made no move, her head already laid on his chest, like at the moment they fell asleep the night before. He held her tight to his body, his hand laid on her back. He wanted never to give her away. _

"_What time is it?" Mercedes asked and looked at him. He already smiled._

"_I don't know. It doesn't matter." He smiled at her too. It felt good to lie with her on the sand at the lake. It was silent and only Mercedes and he mattered. He loved it and Sam could lie all day with her at the pond. Actually they had a tent behind them, but before they got there Mercedes had fallen asleep at his chest and he didn't want to wake her. So he slept next to her and it felt damn good. He hadn't known before how it was with her on his side, it was their first night together. He was the happiest guy on earth at this moment. _

"_Hmm… our parents know that we are here?" Mercedes asked and closed her eyes again. _

"_Yes, I called them last night, remember?" He kissed her forehead again. Her hand was lying on his chest, right next to his heart, which was beating fast. _

"_No, I was too busy putting up the tent." Mercedes muttered to his chest. _

"_Hey, I wanted to help you. You remember what you said?" Sam pressured on her back. "You said Mercedes Jones doesn't need a man to put up a tent." Sam tried to imitate Mercedes. She opened her eyes and laughed. _

"_Don't you dare to make a Mercedes Jones Impression." She pointed with her finger to his nose. He laughed and shook his head._

"_There's no way I would do that." Sam grinned and just looked at her. She was so beautiful, naturally pretty. She was not one of these zombie girls without make up. It was one of many reasons why he loved her. At the moment he stared at her beauty, she hid her face in his chest and covered it with her hand. _

"_Don't stare at me, I look awful." Sam was confused about her words, that's why he grabbed her hand and pushed it away._

"_What are you talking about?" He asked seriously. "You look beautiful as ever." He said with glazed eyes and a small smile. _

"_Liar!" she snapped. Sam groaned. _

"_No I mean it. Don't you dare to think it isn't the truth." He said lovingly and looked her right in the eyes. He didn't liked it when she was this doubtful girl, she was too awesome for that, already by her talent of singing and her good heart. Sam could list a billion reasons why it wasn't necessary for her to have self-doubts. _

_Mercedes slid up a little bit to get nearer to his face. She loved it when he got serious. He was such a dork, but at the right moments he was a beautiful guy, he knew exactly what to say. At this moment she couldn't be happier with him on her side. She was in love and it felt great. She laid her hand on his cheek and smiled lovingly. What had she done to deserve this good looking boy on her side, who looked lovingly at her? She didn't know it, but she wanted to be close to him. Mercedes moved tighter at his body, if it was possible. She felt his tension right at the moment. _

"_Mercedes I –" She laid her index finger on his lips to stop him from talking. Sam instantly felt the tingling in his body like at prom. It was intense and went through his whole body to go hot in his pants and let him panic for a second. Was he ready, was she ready? It was nothing new, not at all. He wanted to have sex with Quinn a year earlier, but she didn't want it and maybe that was a good thing. But it was also a problem, because of this he was still a virgin. Did Mercedes know? Was she a virgin too? He looked at her, tried to relax but it wasn't easy, because she moved her index finger above his chin down to his chest. She was concentrated on his strained body, when she moved her finger. Sam wasn't sure but was there a smile on her lips? He got turned on by her finger which was moving to his stomach and stopped over his pants. He bit on his bottom lip and stared at her finger, when she was looking up to his with a big grin._

"_Do you like it?" She asked innocently and Sam nodded. _

"_Fine." Mercedes grinned and laid her hand on his stomach. She moved his shirt up and stroked his belly with circles. She smiled at him. He instantly reacted to her touch and felt his pants grow tighter. How was she doing this? He was never turned on this fast. He was ashamed a little bit, because she got straight to it and he was still shocked by her actions, so he moved not one millimeter. He tried to process the fact that she headed right to what she wanted. It wasn't easy. She must have noticed, because she stopped to make circles on his stomach. _

"_Are you okay?" Mercedes frowned. _

"_Yeah, I just –" Sam bit his bottom lip. "I didn't expect this." He said now doubtful. He wanted it so badly, his whole body was burning. Longing for her. But he didn't want her to feel constrained._

"_Are you okay with this?" He asked thoughtful. Mercedes nodded but said no word. She instantly started with her hand to move over his abs and then she placed a kiss on his lips. At the start it was shy and slow but it became hot and passionate. Mercedes nibbled on his bottom lip while her hand moved over his stomach. Sam moved his hand over Mercedes backside and then to her hot smooth ass. He moaned into her mouth, when she got closer to his body. They melted into one whole body. Sam grasped at her hair with his other hand und pushed her tighter against his lips. Her lips were smooth and still tasted like the cherry lipstick she used last night. _

"_Mhm…" He mumbled against her lips. She kissed him quick and took a deep breath after that. He made her breathless._

"_What?" she asked with a glazed look. _

"_Your cherry lipstick taste good." Sam said with a low voice and Mercedes giggled and kissed him again. He fucked of his restraint and rolled over her body, so he was lying on her soft body. He smiled in the kiss and licked her lips to with his tongue. She opened her mouth instantly. Sam massaged her tongue with his and smiled at the kiss. She felt so perfect under him that he immediately got more erected than he already was._

_He moved with quick kisses from her cheek over her neck back to her cheek and her mouth. He pushed her t-shirt up and smirked at her, as she put her arms up to get rid of the shirt. He never left her eyes and at the second the shirt felt on the sand next to them, he kissed her passionate again grabbed in her gorgeous black curls. He loved it when these cheeky curls were hanging around her face, like in this moment. He hiked quick kisses from her mouth again, over her cheek to the neck but this time he looked up at her. Sam smirked before he searched his way with wet hot kisses above her chest to the right breast. He slowly licked his way to the nipple and sucked on it. Mercedes moan spurred him on to bite her breast carefully. _

_Mercedes moaned louder and Sam giggled silently, before he kissed his way to the left breast to get Mercedes to moan louder than before. He circled around her breast nipple with his tongue and moved his hand slowly at the side of her body to her ass, at the same time. This time Mercedes giggled and Sam looked up to her. She had her eyelids half closed and he felt her shaking under his touch and kisses. He liked how she reacted and placed kisses over her whole chest along the way to her pelvis. Sam wasn't in rush, although his body was. He ignored it. There was no way they would have fast rough sex. He wanted romantic and he was sure she wanted it too. He slowly kissed her above the jeans and slid his hand into her panties. Her jeans weren't that tight so he had luck this time. He massaged her clit slowly and felt her shaking again. He placed a wet hot kiss on her lips and smiled at her, as she said something. _

"_Sam." Mercedes groaned and he instantly stopped his finger that was stroking her clit._

"_Yeah baby?" He asked with low voice. _

"_Don't stop! Please don't stop." He smirked at her. _

"_I'm not." Sam kissed her again and enjoyed their tongue battle with each other. He slow circled with his finger and felt really turned on by her moaning in his mouth. Sam groaned loud as she placed her hands above his chest and searched slowly every centimeter with her hands. She explored every line on his chest and it was hard for him to concentrate to get her to cum. He rubbed slowly but as she pushed against his fingers he rubbed faster. Mercedes body was shaking as he kissed her deep. After this he got his head between her legs. She grabbed in his blond hair and tried not to scream his name. Mercedes couldn't think one second when he was with his tongue circling around her clit and licking it. _

"_Oh… my… God… Sam." She bit on her bottom lip and closed her eyes. Her whole body was burning, her heart was racing and she felt how she was cum. She briefly breathed as she screamed his name loud and clear._

"_That's my baby." She barely heard him as he placed a short kiss on her cheek and smirked at her with dark green eyes. _

"_It's my turn." She whispered after a deep breath against his lips and gazed at him. _

* * *

_Fuck. _Sam woke up running with sweat and a racing heartbeat. That was intense. The last time he had dreamed of Mercedes was after he left Lima. Sam rubbed with his right hand over his face. Back then he had dreamed of her every night, sometimes about things that really happened, sometimes things he wanted to be happening. Most of his mornings were frustrating back then. He had missed her badly and couldn't change the fact that he didn't live in Lima anymore. He pushed her out of his head after a few months, but his heart had never forgotten her.

Sam had a huge fight with his parents before he left Lima. Sam remembered every little bad word he said to them. He wished he hadn't been such a difficult kid. But there was no chance to change it, to be a better son. His parents were dead, gone forever. Sam sighed. He missed them so much.

After a few minutes he got out of bed, because he heard a sound from the outside of his bedroom. He shared it with Stacie, but most of the time she slept on the couch. She said he was a terrible sleeper. Sam couldn't deny, cause he slept bad the last six months. He gaped while he opened the door and looked with his head to Stacie. She sat on the couch, watching TV. The living room was completely dark and only the TV was shining. Sam's eyes burned because of the bright light that came from it. He blinked and opened the door wider to get through.

"What time is it?" He asked, while he closed his eyes. He had headache. Not surprising after his alcohol intervention a few hours earlier. He was drunk and pissed and also sad. His sister brought him to bed and told him, that everything was going to be alright. Sam thought about the embarrassing moment in High school, when they performed "Tik tok" by Kesha and puked on the stage. He would never get drunk again. He had thought he learned his lesson, but apparently he didn't.

„Sam!" Stacie shrieked. „Oh my god, you scared me to death."

"Sorry hon, that wasn't my intention. What time is it now?" He said apologetically.

„It's 11 pm." Stacie said without looking her brother. She stared at the TV.

"That early?" He asked wondering, while he opened his eyes and walked over to his little sister. She sat on the floor and leaned with her back on the couch. She always did this, since she was a little girl. Sam never understood it but he thought it was kind of cute.

"Not surprising, you were drunk by seven and slept by eight." Stacie said with a lot of sarcasm in her voice. "Yeah it is that early." Sam said nothing to her sarcasm, she had every right to be mad at him. He looked at the TV and held his head. It hurt.

"Do you need a headache pill?" His sister asked caring. Sam shook his head.

"No thanks." There was no way he could sit longer to watch TV with his sister. He just would go to bed again. Get some rest and healthy by sleep. "What's on television?" Sam asked right before he planned to go to bed.

"The MTV Europe Music Awards. At the moment commercials are on but the red carpet starting must be starting every second." Stacie said excited. He knew she loved music and she was a great singer.

"What's about school tomorrow?" He asked. She gave him a death look and said nothing. "Just asking." Sam said and gave up saying something like his parents had, when there were still here. He wasn't a good example for do the right thing. So he had no right to send her to bed. Sam watched the commercial about Pepsi until the intro for the MTV EuropeMusic Awards came and a voice said

"_Welcome of the annual MTV European Music Awards, this year in Germany again. I'm Brad and my co-hostess is already on the red carpet to get some interviews with the musicians. I hear she-" _Sam prop his up on the couch to get back to bed, as he heard her name. _"-is with Mercedes Jones_ _right at the moment. Let's switch to her." _He was frozen standing with his back to the TV. His breath stopped while he was thinking. Maybe he heard wrong and he said another name, but he knew it. He knew it was her. She was a musician Artie said it in the bar. She was famous and he was too busy with himself to know it. He turned slowly and looked at the TV. Stacie stared at her too. His heartbeat raced, when he saw her. She was beautiful dressed up in a long red dress with her straight hair. Her chocolate brown eyes sparkled when the camera was on her. He slowly sat down next to his sister again. She looked at him, but he didn't notice it. He was banned by the beauty of his ex-girlfriend.

* * *

"Mercedes!" Someone screamed.

"Mercedes, I love you!" Another person screamed.

"Here, Mercedes." A whole group screamed.

"Mercedes!" Some people screamed.

She was totally overwhelmed by the lot of people yelling her name. It wasn't her first MTV Award Show, but it was exciting everytime. She loved it to be near to her fans. She wasn't expecting that lot of fans, because she wasn't that famous in European, but that was amazing. She laughed and smiled and posed for the cameras. She was dressed in an evil floor-length fire red dress by Kurt Hummel. She loved the design from the first moment. It had a naughty neckline and was off-the-shoulder. She lost a few pounds over the last years and that's why she could wear such dresses in the first place. She walked to the fans at the start of the red carpet and smiled at them.

"Mercedes, can I get a photo with you?" A little blond girl asked and she nodded.

"Of course." She leaned over to her and smiled brightly at the camera.

"Thank you, you are awesome" Mercedes blushed. It was too cute.

"Thank you." She said quietly and walked by.

After a few more photos and autographs later she ran into Stella Horowitz one of the red carpet hostess, they knew each other briefly.

"Hello Mercedes." Stella greeted.

"Hey nice to see you again, how are you?" Mercedes asked politely.

"Fine thanks. Can I get a short interview with you, before the show starts?" Mercedes nodded. A makeup artist came and powdered her nose a little bit before the camera was on her and the hostess. The cameraman counted silently from three to one and told them so that they were live now.

"Thank you, Brad. I'm here with Mercedes Jones the famous singer. Her first single "Love you like a love song" was in the American single charts more than ten weeks and her first album 'Broken Strings' is still in the top ten in the charts. How does it feel to be so successful?" Mercedes watched attentive at the reporter as she spoke, but she couldn't stop herself from thinking about Sam. Without him she would have never wrote her first single. It was kind of ironic. But how Mr. Shue at Glee Club had said, songs are about pain or pure love and she had been in love when she wrote it.

"Incredible. I was sitting on the couch when someone told me my song is number one in the charts. I just couldn't believe it." Mercedes answered. She felt kind of bothered by the question, because she heard it more often than the song self.

"And then I got the news that the Album is in the charts. I was thrilled by it. I think I was drunk in that night too." Mercedes laughed.

"I'm a little curious I hope that's okay, but I read that your first song is about your first love. Is it true?" Mercedes swallowed. She mentioned it in an interview a few months ago, by mistake. Now it came back. Quinn warned her, that this Question would come back to her. Mercedes tried to answer nonchalant.

"Yes it is. But that's a long time ago." Mercedes said with hope to get another question, far away from this topic.

"What was his name?" Mercedes tried to ignore the sadness inside of her and tried to smile. She knew his name, because it was Sam Evans. Her first love and her first break up. She hated the feelings of missing him since he left Lima. After ten years she was still in love with him and she hated it. Mercedes had hoped that she would never have to answer this question but now she was without a chance. She had to answer it. She had two options. Option one to name him and risk to get her feelings revealed or two to tell a big huge lie. Mercedes just needed a few seconds to get the right way.

"That's kind of embarrassing, I don't remember his name." Mercedes answered causal and shrugged her shoulders. She felt sick right at the moment when the words left her mouth. But it was too late and she said to herself, there's no reason to be mad at herself. She didn't even know where Sam was or how he was. There was no reason to be pissed with her for such a lie. iIt wasn't like he heard it/i She thought.

"Oh that was unexpected. When did you write the song?" The reporter looked confused.

"I was sixteen." Mercedes laughed.

"Well, then. Are you excited about the nomination?" Mercedes was relieved because of the change of the subject and got the last few questions over her. Stella Horowitz thanked her for her time and after that Mercedes looked out for Kurt who was her plus one on the event and wanted to avoid the red carpet. Kurt indeed loved to be the center of an event, but he didn't want to steal hear spotlight. She loved him for that. She checked her cell phone, when it suddenly rang. The ringtone was 'Touch-A Touch-Me' by Rocky Horror Picture Show. Although she liked the show she had never caught this as her ringtone and she was sure Kurt set it as ringtone. Mercedes sighed and got on her phone.

* * *

"What are you talking about?!" Sam snapped after the greeting of Mercedes. He didn't even know why he already had her number on his cell phone and to be true he never expected that the number would work. But he had to try just to get his angry thoughts off of his head. Because he saw the interview and got pissed, he got really pissed by her words. She wrote her first single about him and he was thrilled to hear that, but she kicked his ass badly a few minutes later. He felt like someone kicked him into the stomach and he could barely breathe. He felt his cheeks go red from heat.

"Who is this?" Mercedes carefully asked. She knew who was on the phone at the moment when he had said one word, but his rough sound annoyed her. She could never forget his dark voice and the southern accent, but she would never give him the satisfaction that she knew who was on the phone, that's why she put herself dumb.

"Are you kidding?!" He almost spit through the phone.

"Sam?" She asked reserved. He was damn rude and she was not willing to accept that.

"Damn right! It's Sam Evans, you remember? I was your boyfriend in highschool." He didn't even know what he was talking. His words came out of his mouth too fast, he couldn't stop them.

"How did you get this number?" She asked with a cold voice. It only made him angrier.

"From you, when you were kissing me after prom. You obviously never changed it." Sam said mad.

"Oh…" Mercedes harrumphed. "That's right. I never changed it." She admitted. Mercedes never realized that she had her cell phone number since Highschool. Maybe it was time for another one. But now it was too late and Sam got her on the phone after ten years. She was confused and also pissed by his mean voice. She was annoyed mostly about herself, because she didn't look on the phone to see who was calling. Mercedes sighed silently and got the phone from her ear to look on it. There were big letters, 'Sam Evans'. Unbelievable she never deleted his number. She decided that destiny was a bitch.

Sam laughed throatily.

"Why are you calling?" Mercedes couldn't believe he was only calling to get her pissed off. Sam couldn't even laugh at this stupid question. He sighed.

"Because you are talking bullshit on the international TV." He said harshly. Mercedes didn't even know what to say about his words. She was totally overwhelmed to hear from him. But his rough voice made her sad and angry at the same time.

"I don't know what you mean." Mercedes sighed again and just wanted to end this pointless conversation. But Sam seemed to give vent to his anger.

"You just said a few minutes ago you don't remember the name of your first boyfriend." Sam snapped.

"And?" She was really annoyed.

"And? I was your first boyfriend." He snapped again. Mercedes gasped. He was such an asshole. She didn't even know at this moment why she had been in love with him the last ten years. She remembered a different Sam.

"Don't be so sure." She tried not to let him have a victory of this conversation.

"You told me back then." He said anxious.

"Maybe I lied." She tried to sound bored by the conversation. Actually she felt sick about it.

"You wouldn't do something like that." He got anxious with every word of her. Sam tried to calm him down, but he was already disappointed and her words made him feel like an idiot.

"You are really confident of yourself, are you?" Mercedes snapped. She had so many feelings in her heart she couldn't handle it any longer. She felt like she had to cry every second. After ten years he called her to snap at her. That was a nightmare or something like that. She looked again for Kurt to get a reason to hang up with him.

"That's not the point. I thought I knew you." He said convinced.

"And I thought I had deserved a boyfriend who didn't move away and didn't even text me after that. I thought I had deserved someone better than you." She answered pissed and after the words came out of her mouth she wanted to get them back.

"I mean Sam-" She was interrupted by his harsh words.

"You're right I was never enough for you, for a daughter of a dentist and pilot. Sorry for interrupting your glamorous life. Have a nice life Mercedes." Sam said disappointed and sad. Before Mercedes could answer he hung up on her. He got his cell phone and threw it against the wall. Stacie shrieked again and stood up to look after her big brother who stood in the bedroom and fought against the tears.

"What happened? Are you okay, Sammy?" She asked carefully.

"Yeah everything is alright. I need a new cell phone that's all." Sam said tired.

"I'll go back to bad." He said too.

"Okay." Stacie mumbled and looked at Sam who was going to bed. "Um… that's a bad moment, but Artie called and he really wanted you to call him back." Stacie said carefully. "I forgot to tell you, sorry." She said silently.

"And his number is on my cell phone. How ironic is that?" He throatily laughed. "Did he say what he wanted?" Sam asked and looked at his blond sister.

"Um…, I don't remember?" She said and shrugged her shoulders. "Sorry." She apologized again.

"Karma is definitely a bitch." Sam moaned, when his sister left the bedroom and closed the door. It was already dark and he thought about the conversation of Mercedes and her harsh but true words. He never was worth to be her boyfriend. But still he knew he had these feelings for her. He wanted to be worth to be her boyfriend. He knew it was stupid, but he still had these strong feelings for her, after ten years.


	4. Trying to walk through that

_**First: Thank you very much to my b-reader and a good friend of mine roni, you are amazing 3  
and then sorry I couldn't update sooner. I don't want to rush on the story.  
Thank you for read… I am very inspired by your reviews :) **_

_**Let me know what do you think what Kurts plan is! :)  
Enough from me, have fun with chapter 4.**_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. **

* * *

**CHAPTER 4**

_**Trying to walk through that pain**_

She had been really confused after the phone call, but she was pissed at Sam as well. How could he call like this, after years? She didn't get it. Mercedes couldn't understand why he was so upset, if someone had the right to be upset it was her. She had been left behind, not Sam. He had never called her, texted her or tried to contact Mercedes in some other way. She never understood why she deserved it. She thought they were more then just a summer fling. But she went wrong on this and after these years she was still in love with him, but she had accepted that she didn't see him again. She was fine with it, until his phone call. He was not just rude, he was mean and an asshole. Mercedes sighed while she poked her ice cream with the spoon.

"What happened?" Kurt asked while he watched his bestie torture the innocent ice cream. He was wonderful when he had joined her after the talk with Sam. He had asked, but she had been to hurt to talk about it, so he let her go. Kurt never brought the talk up until now. It was two days, six hours and two minutes since she almost had a meltdown because of Sam. Mercedes didn't look at Kurt, when she began to tell about the whole call. Kurt said no word and just listened.

"Sounds like he spit fire threw the phone. I bet his pride was hurt because of your words." Kurt said with a laughed smile.

"It's not funny Kurt." Mercedes said annoyed.

"It is kind of." Kurt answered again with a smile, but he got her more ice cream at the same time. She always ate it, when she felt bad. It wasn't good for her body but she didn't care in moments like this one. Later in the day she would definitely feel bad about it, she knew it.

"No it's not Kurt." She said more annoyed then before and Kurt looked her in the eyes and tried not to laugh. It was just a phone call from someone she didn't see for years. He didn't really understand why she was so upset.

"Tell me why." He challenged her. He looked her directly in her eyes.

"You know what? I shouldn't have told you in the first place. Forget it." Mercedes poked her ice cream again and laid her eyes on it. She never told him about Sam and her. She never realized it but in this moment she thought about it. It hadn't been necessary; there had been nothing between them in senior year. It was just a summer fling. She sighed again. She was such an idiot to be upset because of it, but he had been damn rude and she wasn't ready to accept that.

"No, no…" Kurt snapped. "There's no way you are not telling me that you and Sam did not have something." Mercedes looked shocked at him and her eyes widened.

"Where do you know that from?" She asked carefully.

"Not from you, that's for sure." He said with a sad smile on his face. Mercedes felt bad that she never told him this little detail about her summer.

"Sorry." She said apologetically. She meant it like she said it. She was sorry because she never wanted to keep it a secret. It was just so pointless to talk about Sam and their summer after he moved and left her behind. "I mean he had no right to call me and yell at me."

"No he had not." Kurt said seriously. "But maybe he had a point."

"He fucking said he was my boyfriend. No one knew about us, we never talked about it. It's been ten years for god sake." Mercedes said annoyed.

"Maybe he felt that way." Kurt tried to help.

"No, he never felt that way." Mercedes said convinced about it.

"How would you know that?" Kurt asked.

"He never, I mean never called me or tried to get contact with me." Mercedes snapped.

"Maybe-" Kurt started to say but got interrupted by Mercedes.

"No maybe, Kurt. He never tried! Never!" Mercedes yelled.

"Maybe he was. Maybe he wrote a letter and sent it in a bottle. Maybe he wrote text messages and they never came to you?" Kurt suggested why Sam never talked after his move to her.

"Are you defending him?" Mercedes asked in disbelieving.

"No! I just mean… he called you, now." Kurt answered cautious. He already liked Sam from the start and to believe he was some asshole who let his best friend suffer, wasn't really conform to his opinion about Sam Evans.

"What?!" Mercedes snapped and got angry.

"Just saying." Kurt defended himself.

"No way I'm the bad one in this thing. He called me to piss me off. After all these years he just called me to tell me I have to say his name on international TV. Who does ever tell the truth on TV? How could he think that I forgot him? And why does he still have my number?" Mercedes got really pissed at this moment, when Kurt tried to defend him. She wasn't the one who called and yelled at someone she liked. No, she was not that person. She just tried to defend herself while she talked with Sam. She also realized she had to change her number as soon as possible, before she got another hate call from her ex-boyfriend.

"But he called after all these years, is it meaningless to you?" Kurt asked carefully, because he saw her face turned into a slight red. "And Sweetie you never changed your number." Kurt said quietly.

"Yes it is! I'm not that little girl anymore Kurt. I'm not waiting for some asshole to call me, and certainly not after years." She said with anger in her voice and threw the spoon away from her. She got up from her chair and shook her head. It was pointless to discuss with Kurt, he was on Sam's side. She knew he liked him a lot but she was his best friend not Sam. He had to be on her side.

"I know-" Kurt tried but Mercedes cut in harsh.

"You are on his side, fine. I am going to look for a new best friend." She said roughly and turned her back on him. When she was almost out of the kitchen she turned around and pointed her finger on Kurt.

"When did you made a custom ringtone for Sam?" She stared at him.

"Um… " Kurt thought about her words and then he laughed. "Oh my gosh, I almost forgot. It's from the Rocky Horror Picture Show right?" Mercedes nodded with fire red cheeks.

"You remember a few weeks after the summer holidays? You had a diva-off with Rachel?" Kurt looked at her with a small smile on his face. She nodded.

"Well you forgot your phone at the auditorium I got it and when it rang I saw a photo with you two on it. I never saw it before so I got curious." He bit his bottom lip ready to get trouble with Mercedes, but she said none word.

"Maybe I had sneaked around at it. Read some SMS between you two and was slightly pissed at you, because you kept it a secret." Kurt looked apolitically at her.

"Maybe I made this ringtone, when you were rehearsing at my home for the number against Rachel." He told.

"But why?" Mercedes asked with a low voice and stared at her best friend.

"Because I wanted you to admit that there was something between you and Sam and I mean the song is like a confession. I mean he was Rocky you were _Frank N__. __Furter_." Mercedes eyes widened.

"Maybe I found it was funny too?" Mercedes took a step to Kurt.

"The point is, I thought when he was calling you would get embarrassed because of the ringtone and would tell me about him."

"But he never called." Mercedes ended the story of Kurts and looked sad at him. She wasn't pissed anymore and felt like her heart hurt. It wasn't easy for her. She thought she would never see him again and now it was like he pushed himself in her life, again. Her life was good. Maybe she hasn't a life full of love, now. At the moment she lived through the love life of her friends good enough. That was enough. Stupid to think that this phone call had changed something.

"Yes. I'm sorry Mercedes." Kurt apologized. "I never meant to hurt you with it."

"I know." She said and sat back down on her chair to eat the ice cream.

"But maybe-" Kurt couldn't finished his sentence.

"There is no maybe." Mercedes said sad while she took a huge spoon filled with ice cream.

* * *

"Saaaaaaam! You are late, what are you doing?" Stacie yelled. Sam stood in the bedroom and stared at his passport. This was his chance, but he couldn't let his sister alone and what was with Stevie? It was the fifth time he packed his stuff and unpacked it a few hours later. He sighed. Why was this so hard to decide? He hadn't hesitated a few months earlier, but now. This was a whole new situation and someone had to take care of his younger sister. Sam sighed again, as his sister joined him in the bedroom.

"Sam you will miss your flight to New York." She said irritated. Sam stuffed the Passport into his suitcase and looked at her.

"I can't do this." He said seriously.

"Why?" Stacie asked. Sam looked sad at her. He felt guilty to leave her alone.

"No, no…" Stacie said and hugged her brother. "I'm fine Sammy." She whispered near his ear.

"Are you sure?" He asked nervously. He wasn't sure about this whole idea, to fly to New York and try to run a business.

"Yes, I'm seventeen Sammy, I'm fine and just in case there is Stevie." She said with a smile.

"That's why I'm concerned." Sam answered frowning.

"You have to go, now!" Stacie laughed and took his suitcase to get it out of their little flat. Sam looked after her and smiled. She was stronger than he had ever been. Sam loved her and he never could imagine a life without her. That was the reason why he felt so sick about leaving her alone at home while he would meet Artie in New York. On the other side she was a young adult he had to accept that she could take care of herself. It was hard to realize, that he was the one who needed someone to take care of him and not his little sister. Of course in case she would take care of Stevie, too. There was no way Sam would think Stevie could take care of Stacie. He was to wild for this. Stevie worked and earned his own money, but he loved also to party on the weekends too. So there was no way Sam could think he wouldn't take Stacie with him in the Clubs in Kentucky. Stacie waved at him and Sam left the flat.

"Take care of yourself." Sam whispered, while he hugged her.

"Take care of yourself, Sam." She answered with a big smile, while she took the suitcase in the care trunk at the taxi. Sam nodded. "And Sam?" Stacie looked at him. He stopped short before he put in the taxi and looked at his little sister.

"She will understand." Stacie smiled cheery. He nodded.

"Thank you Stacie." Sam put himself in the taxi and waved at his sister, when the driver started the car.

After half an hour he arrived at the airport and paid for the drive. He was really late because of his doubts to leave Park Hill. He wasn't sure at all. But he knew, he wouldn't forgive himself, if it was the right thing to do and he never tried to figure it out. So he was there on the airport ready to get on his flight to New York. Ready to find out, if Artie was right. Maybe this was his chance to get his life right. Maybe it was time to get out of his safe bubble.

He didn't know why he started to believe in himself right now. Maybe it was the talk with Mercedes. Sam was disappointed at her and her voice made him angrier. He had never felt this hurt before. All these years he never knew how deeply he missed her. It made him sad, that he couldn't tell her because of his idiotic behaviour. Sam sighed again. He had wanted to call her again a day later, but he had been too scared to call her. There was no way to say sorry for his words and her words had hurt him too. It was so damn complicated.

He checked in and got on the flight a few minutes later. He sat on the window and stared out of it, while he waited that the airplane started to bring him to New York. He couldn't really afford it, but there was an account book for his sister's college. She insisted to take the money to make his dream come true. He couldn't argue with her, 'cause she just bought the ticket 2 days ago and said that he had no choice. Sam had been really pissed at her, but he knew she just wanted the best for him. He felt himself useless as a big brother. But after New York he would come back as the new Sam, as a better brother for his little sister. He had a little piece of hope, because of Artie.

Sam never thought Artie Abrams could change his life, turns out that he indeed could. After the fight with Mercedes on the phone, Stacie said Artie called. He needed half a day to repair his broken cellphone to get the number out to call Artie back.

"_Abrams, how can I help you?" A smooth voice said politely. _

"_Artie? It's Sam." Sam answered insecure. _

"_Oh Sam, good that you call me back. I talked with your sister a few days earlier. She said you were drunk and not capable of a short talk, but she would tell you. Are you okay?" Artie sounded concerned. _

"_Umm…, yeah, yeah I'm fine. I just…" Sam didn't knew what to say, so he hoped Artie wouldn't ask further. _

"_It doesn't matter. The main point is that you are fine." Artie answered not less concerned than before, but it wasn't his business and that's why he never asked further. Sam was a good guy, he knew that for sure. The loss of his parents was enough reason to get drunk for Artie, he would do too if it were his parents. So he thought if Sam was ready to talk, he would be there as a friend and he would listen. _

"_Yeah, I'm fine." Sam said. _

"_Good, good. I have something to talk about. It's because of your ideas." Artie said business. _

"_Umm… I'm not sure what are you talking about?" Sam asked confused. _

"_The Comic, remember?" Artie said and laughed. "You told me about it a few days after the funeral of your parents. Maybe you were drunk a little bit, but you said you had an idea and you wanted to realize it. You said that you are just not good at drawing." _

"_Embarrassing, but yes I remember." Sam scratched his neck, while he held the phone on his ear and spoke to Artie. _

"_I really liked your idea and I thought about it. I had some ideas too. Maybe we can talk about it?" Artie explained. _

"_And then?" Sam asked confused, again. _

"_We publish it, what do you think?" Artie laughed. _

"_I really don't know what you are talking about." Sam wasn't just confused, he thought Artie got crazy. _

"_Okay, sorry maybe I am too fast." Artie said apologetically. "Sam, your ideas were brilliant, genius if I am honest. I thought about it and I had some ideas for it. I think there is a chance to publish it." Artie explained further. _

"_But we are suck at drawing." Sam said still confused._

"_Yeah that's our problem. But I solved it." Artie said proud of himself. _

"_How?" Sam asked. _

"_You have to come to New York, I can't tell you on the phone. Maybe you can get on an airplane and talk face to face with me?" Artie said seriously. _

"_I can't afford a flight to New York, Artie." Sam said honestly and it hurt to say it. _

"_I wish I could pay it for you, but I can't afford it too. Maybe there is an opportunity to get money for the flight in any other way?" Artie said sympathetic. _

"_Yeah I'll let you know." Sam answered and said goodbye to Artie._

Now he had found some opportunity and wasn't sure what exactly he was doing on an airplane to New York. Maybe it was a bad choice, but Sam hoped Artie was right. Maybe there was a chance to publish his comic idea. He just didn't know how Artie solved the problem concerning the drawing. He sucked at it and he knew Artie couldn't draw either. Maybe he just needed to trust his old Highschool friend.

* * *

"Nothing?" Mercedes asked disappointed. "Nothing at all?" Mercedes sighed. "Kurt where is your power? I thought you are Harry Potter or something like that."

"Sorry. I am not capable of finding Puck. It's like he left Lima and never showed up in any other country on the planet again." Kurt sighed too. He never thought it would be that difficult to find someone like Puck. He was not dumbass, but he wasn't overly smart too.

"It's not your fault babe." Blaine said and kissed his boyfriend on the cheek. Mercedes nodded in agreement.

"I really thought I could find him, it's frustrating." Kurt said disappointed in himself. He thought he could find him and now all he had was nothing after six months. He really had no clue where Puck was.

"That means we need Finn?" Mercedes asked.

"Plan B." Blaine said and nodded.

"Plan B." Kurt agreed and nodded too.

"Where is he?" Mercedes asked and looked at her best friend. She knew he was a really smart guy. He had a really good plan, but without Puck or Finn it would be impossible to get Quinn to New York or to get Rachel to Los Angeles. They needed them in one place, for Kurt it wasn't necessary where exactly.

Kurt smiled because of Mercedes question. "Good news." Mercedes smiled too at his words.

"He called his mother and of course my father a few days ago." Kurt's eyes lightened up. "Finn said he was back and stationed at New York. He said he would visit our parents in a few days and he wanted to see me too, when he is back from his home visit." Kurt had a big grin on his face.

"That's amazing Kurt." Mercedes said. She was glad he was home. She didn't know exactly where he had been, but she guessed he had not been in the USA. So she was glad he was safe at home and she was glad because of their plan B too.

"Yes it is. I think Mom is glad he is back. She really hates that he stays with the army. She wanted him back in Lima in the dad's garage. He wants it too." Kurt stopped short. "And if I'm honest I want him to as well. I really get scared everytime he leaves to take his duty."

"When did you start to call Carroll your mom?" Mercedes asked honestly surprised.

"Umm…, I guess a few years ago." Kurt answered, surprised by the question.

"She is a good mom." Blaine said and smiled at Mercedes.

"I think so too." She said with a big grin. There was nothing wrong about it, she was just surprised to hear this one word out of Kurts mouth. She never knew he really saw Carroll Hummel his stepmother as his real mother. Because it had been so difficult between Finn and Kurt at the start and the marriage between Burt Hummel and Carroll Hudson had been surprising. But after all they were a family and Mercedes really liked this thought.

"Yes she is sweetie." Kurt smiled happy. "After we found out that I really love Carroll as my mom and Finn is back in town soon, can we start to take care of Beth?" Kurt said seriously and looked at his boyfriend and Mercedes. Both nodded in agreement.


End file.
